There are words inside of me that are calling to be released. I've kept them in my mind for too long. They keep me awake at night. They are a multitude of stories, childhood experiences, spiritual awakenings and realizations. They are fragments of songs that play inside my head daily.
There are different places for all these words. I struggle as I try to figure out where they all fit. My big resolution for 2010 is to actually make progress on my novel. I've realized that I'm afraid to write fiction. I think it's because every word that comes from me is personal and steeped in reality. But I must let go of that fear and see where I end up. These characters deserve to find their place in the world. They are beautiful and unique, and I love each and every one of them.
A few years ago I won a beautiful leather-bound journal in a contest. Very simply on the front, these words are engraved:
"If you wish to be a writer, write."
I carried this journal with me yesterday and wrote as I waited for my son to complete his speech therapy session. I couldn't believe how easily my character's story began pouring out. Maybe I have to take a more organic approach to putting this piece of work together. Later I can transfer these words onto my computer, but for now I feel free and ready to take flight. Stay tuned.